Dear Hannah,

I can only make generall suggestions regarding a situation such as yours.  You provided very few details.  I'll assume you live in the USA and are less than 18 years of age.  If so, I don't think it would be legal for your parent to abandon you or kick you out of the home. 

I suggest you speak with your school counselor. or school social worker.  The counselor or social worker would be able to evaluate your situation in more detail and create a plan for you.  If you are not in school, or don't have a counselor or social worker available, you could speak with a trusted adult, school nurse, your physician, Children's Protective Services or the Department of Family & Children in your hometown.  Hopefuly, you can find someone to help you and your mother improve your relationship.  Start working on this today.

Dear dana,

Youth First doesn't offer a program of this type.  You may be referring to a "Teen Court" program provided through Youth Resources (a different organization).  I believe that program involves teens judging and deciding on legal consequences for young people that are involved in some types of criminal activity.  I'm not sure they are dealing with drug related cases.

Dear ,

Contact Parri Black, President & CEO, at the address &/or phone numbers listed on the website. 

Dear Ann,

Yes, we have a young mens' program scheduled for Fall.  Exact date is undetermined.  We are currently reviewing and improving the curriculum.  Laura Wathen, Youth First Program Director, oversees this program.  Call 812 421 8336 if you have additional questions..

Dear Steve,

I'm assuming you live in the Evansville area.  If not, please share additional information through "Ask Youth First". 

There is no charge for evaluation and short term help from a school counselor or Youth First social worker.  If your school has a Youth First social worker, you can see them once and then parental permission will be required for additional visits.  This does not mean that your privacy is compromised, but only that your parents need to consent for the visits if you are under the age of 18. 

If you need longer term assistance you may be referred to a community resource such as Southwest Indiana Behavioral Health.  They bill according to income levels.  No insurance is required.  Other treatment providers in the community may be able to provide similar assistance.  The social worker or school counselor can provide you with this information. 

Dear Kayla,

The short answer is "yes".  Early sexual relationships, heterosexual or homosexual, outside of marriage, or in a relationship that is of short duration carries significant risks - both physical and emotional. 

The following pages are from the U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services Website: http://www.4parents.gov/sexrisky/emotional/emotional.html

"People often believe that the only risks from teens having sex are pregnancy or getting an STD. Not true. Teens who have sex are at risk for emotional problems too.

It has been clear for quite some time that teen sex and emotional problems such as depression are related. What has not been clear is if teen sex causes depression, or depression causes teens to have sex. Recent research suggests that both may be true. Teens, especially girls, who have sexual intercourse may be at greater risk for depression.  And depression in teens is now known to lead to risky sexual behaviors. 

A 2005 study recommended that teen girls who have sex be screened for depression. This journal article found that teen girls who had sex, took drugs, and/or started drinking were up to three times more likely to be depressed a year later than girls who did not take those risks. 

For boys, the researchers found things to be a bit different. Boys who do a number of unhealthy things, like smoking cigarettes every day, smoking marijuana, and drinking alcohol, were more likely to be depressed. 

Another study, which also used data from that same large survey of teens, tried to learn whether depression predicts risky sexual behavior. The researchers found that boys and girls who have symptoms of depression are more likely to get involved in very risky sexual behaviors, such as not using a condom, having sex with a number of partners, and using alcohol or other drugs when they had sex. 

One thing is also very clear: most teens who have sex wish they had waited. In fact, whether you ask boys or girls, older teens or younger teens, a large majority say they wish they had waited. According to a survey conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, 2 out of 3 (66%) sexually experienced teens wish they had waited longer before first having sexual intercourse.  And nearly 2 out of 3 (63%) of those teen boys and more than 2 out of 3 (69%) of those teen girls wish they had waited.  And of those teens 12- to 14-years-old, 7 out of 10 (71%) wish they had waited.  Of those teens 15-19, 6 out of 10 (63%) said they wish they had waited."

Dear Lola,

Your question is somewhat vague, but I think you might be referring to misperceptions regarding some of the potential adverse effects experienced by those taking prescription medications for mental illnesses.

In this country there is a very long process of evaluation for medications that are ultimately made available to the public by a physician's prescription.  The risk of adverse effects are carefully weighed against the potential benefit to those who need medical help because of mental illness. 

Every medicine, even aspirin and other over-the-counter drugs, has the potential for adverse effects. Most drug side effects are minor while others can be life threatening.  Mental illnesses can also be relatively mild or, in other instances, life threatening.

After this approval process and prescribing, reports of possible adverse effects are reported by the medical community and tracked by agencies overseeing drug safety.  It's not a perfect system, but it's better than in many other countries.  Many products are not approved and, therefore, never released because of safety concerns.  If concerns are found after release, they are sometimes withdrawn from the marketplace.  The severity of some illnesses may warrant taking medications that carry more risk of adverse effects. 

After research by phamaceutical companies to evaluate a product, application for approval, and subsequent approval by federal agencies, the decision to use them is between a doctor and the patient.  Thanks for asking Youth First.

Dear Danielle,

You will need to view this as a long-term effort on his part.  There are no quick fixes for the problems you describe. 

If he has a substance abuse problem, you should see if he can get into a proper treatment program.  If you have the resources, he may benefit from a long-term residential program such as Aspen Ranch (Google it) in Utah.  There are limited, out-patient treatment services for substance abusing teens are available in Evansville. 

If your son has a serious conduct disorder, he may need far more help than any of the Youth First programs provide.  The key to success for him will be a intense personal desire for positive change.  If he doesn't want to change his behavior/attitude/lifestyle and accept the advice/guidance of those who want to help, it is unlikely that he will be successful. 

Intensive supervision by his probation officer, random drug screens,an individual therapist, school social worker support, along with clear limits & immediate consequences for misbehavior in home, school, or community will be helpful. 

A program could help if he's receptive to assistance.  If there is a Youth First school social worker at his school, she would need to meet your son for a thorough evaluation and determination of which programs might be of help.  If he is not a "fit" for a program, he still might be appropriate for social worker support when he returns to the school setting. 

Youth First social workers and our programs are not available at every Evansville school.  You may want to contact the Youth First office (Davi Stein, 812 421 8336) to find out what is available at your son's school.

Dear Lloyd,

Your concerns are certainly justified.  When alcohol and tobacco use start early in life there is greater risk of serious, life-long problems.  The consequences you have provided are also very reasonable.  If the behavior continues, your son may be "offered" additional consequences (school discipline, legal, accidents, relationship problems, health issues, etc.) that have more impact.  These consequences may get his attention and provide you with opportunities to have additional conversations.  In the meantime, your son may benefit from some assistance from Youth First or another agency. 

Youth  First offers a variety of prevention/intervention strategies.  The web site shares information on some of them. They are based on the age, school, level of involvement and other risk factors.  There is no charge for any of our services.  We depend totally on donations and grants to sustain services for children and families.

If you will contact Josh at Youth First (812 421 8336, ext. 0) and leave a message for Dr. Wooten (your name, phone number), I would be happy to call you & share what resources we have at your son's school and help him connect to those services or make other other suggestions. 

Dear sigh, who cares,

It sounds like you are feeling overwhelmed with life and aren’t sure where to turn.  I suggest you see someone who will provide you with support right away.   

Please contact your school social worker today.   Be open and honest with her about your feelings and circumstances.  Even if she is busy, I’m sure she will want to know that this is a hard time for you.  She will evaluate and suggest additional steps to improve your feelings.  You could also try talking to other caring adults in your life like your parents, your pastor, a physician, minister, or a coach.  

Depression sometimes tricks us into believing that others don’t care even when they do.   

If you would send "Ask Youth First" additional information (your hometown, school name, social worker name, and even your name), I may be able to offer other suggestions.  I won’t post any specific, identifying information about you on the website.

There is also a crisis line, 812-425-4355, that provides 24-hour service if you just need someone to talk to after regular office hours.

Never "give up".  Reaching out is a good first step, but please don't stop with this email to "Ask Youth First".   Take additional steps that will help you feel better about yourself and your life.